Let’s talk compatibility. It is entirely possible to share the same life values, philosophy or career, and still not have chemistry. Personal life experience, hobbies and goals, may simply not mesh. Just because you find that a man isn’t your cup of tea, doesn’t mean he’s a bad guy. I once had coffee with a gentleman who told me that he worked from sun up to sun down, had dinner and went to bed. Six days a week. He had never traveled far from home and didn’t care to start now. Traveling is a way of life for me, so a shared work ethic wasn’t enough. He was a decent person, but definitely not for me.
The man who couldn’t stop talking about his military special ops and dropping names of high level politicians may have been trying to impress me, but it had the opposite effect. I’m military, political, and always interested in listening to veterans tell of their experiences. But, there are more aspects to life than just being a badass. I admire all the good he has done, but we were definitely not compatible.
One man’s actions totally melted my heart. I’m not sure it would have had the same effect on all women, but what he did spoke volumes to me about his character. We had been dating for a short time. One day we were talking on the phone and I told him I wanted to carry a concealed weapon. I was weighing my options concerning weapons, holsters, etc., as I had never carried a weapon in this manner. The next day he came to see me and took off his weapon, belt and holster. He put them on me and started explaining different options I could consider. He wanted me to know what it felt like so I could get an idea of what would work for me. He wasn’t being a know-it-all or trying to show what a ‘big man’ he was. He was educating me and being patient. He was showing that he cared about my safety.
There are men I greatly admire whom I would never consider as a partner. They are good men, just not for me. So when you are working through your criteria for a mate, there’s no reason to trash someone just because they aren’t right for YOU. You’ll be surprised how many real friends you can make on the journey of finding the partner of your dreams.