Reason is the cornerstone of parenting. Parenting is the actions one takes to train a mind and nurture a spirit, enabling a human being to become an independent individual. Parenting is not a passive activity.
This page of Raising Reason is about inspiring parents to think about the ‘how’ and the ‘why’ of raising an independent, happy child. There are no 7 rules, 5 events or even a 12-step program. There is reason. There is your brain and your ability to use it. The goal is to better understand what it is to be a human being, to be an individual and learn to enjoy our relationships.
We will address current events and trends, as well as personal experiences, to give real examples of how reason works in our relationships. No one is a perfect parent, but the best parents continue to learn and grow along with their child. Some of your best parenting may not be remembered by your child, but it will be reflected in them. Whether you are just thinking about having children, in the middle of it all or your children are grown, I hope the writings here will be educational and helpful.
Let’s talk compatibility. It is entirely possible to share the same life values, philosophy or career, and still not have chemistry. Personal life experience, hobbies and goals, may simply not mesh. Just because you find that a man isn’t your cup of tea, doesn’t mean he’s a bad guy. I once had coffee with a gentleman who told me that he worked from sun up to sun down, had dinner and went to bed. Six days a week. He had never traveled far from home and didn’t care to start now. Traveling is a way of life for me, so a shared work ethic wasn’t enough. He was a decent person, but definitely not for me.
The man who couldn’t stop talking about his military special ops and dropping names of high level politicians may have been trying to impress me, but it had the opposite effect. I’m military, political, and always interested in listening to veterans tell of their experiences. But, there are more aspects to life than just being a badass. I admire all the good he has done, but we were definitely not compatible.
One man’s actions totally melted my heart. I’m not sure it would have had the same effect on all women, but what he did spoke volumes to me about his character. We had been dating for a short time. One day we were talking on the phone and I told him I wanted to carry a concealed weapon. I was weighing my options concerning weapons, holsters, etc., as I had never carried a weapon in this manner. The next day he came to see me and took off his weapon, belt and holster. He put them on me and started explaining different options I could consider. He wanted me to know what it felt like so I could get an idea of what would work for me. He wasn’t being a know-it-all or trying to show what a ‘big man’ he was. He was educating me and being patient. He was showing that he cared about my safety.
There are men I greatly admire whom I would never consider as a partner. They are good men, just not for me. So when you are working through your criteria for a mate, there’s no reason to trash someone just because they aren’t right for YOU. You’ll be surprised how many real friends you can make on the journey of finding the partner of your dreams.
I am not standing with France. I AM standing for civilized mankind. You know what else I am? I’m a human being who is sick and tired of the carnage; of the inability of world and local leaders to identity the real problems; of total inaction by those tasked with defense of the citizenry. I mourn the innocent dead and I hate those who murdered them. I’ve stood with Israel, France, Boston, Fort Hood, Tennessee. What does ‘stand with’ even mean? Sure, we sympathize. Then what?
We are at war. We are at war with Iran and several other nations who support Islamic jihad. World leaders know who is responsible. Yes, they know. But, they will not act to eradicate the threat. After each act of jihad, the propaganda machines go into overdrive to convince people that it was an isolated event or that it was perpetrated by governments to gain more control over the people (lovely conspiracy theories).
Those who still have brain cells intact know this war has been going on a long time. Islamic jihadists have waged a very long and orchestrated attack against civilization. They are emboldened by those who refuse to identify them and fail to mount a proper defense against them.
The fight has already come to our doorstep. September 11, 2001, Fort Hood, the military recruiting stations and Boston; strangers stalking military families near their homes; a proliferation of mosques/Islamic Learning Centers around the country; our nation’s courts deliberating on the legality of allowing Sharia Law (totally unConstitutional, by the way);and Hamtramk, Michigan, now has an all-Muslim city council. If you know nothing of these things, it’s time you learned.
The government has the job of defending the citizens against enemy attacks. They have failed in a spectacular fashion. So what do we Americans do right now?
1) Buy guns and ammo. Learn how to use them. Carry them.
2) Call and email every one of your elected representatives, from your mayor to your Congressman, and let them know you will not allow Invasion by Immigration to happen in your town or state. One person CAN make a difference, so don’t tell me it won’t matter if you call. If you don’t call, I can guarantee that you will forever know in your heart that you didn’t even try to save your country, your freedom and your way of life. One call. One email.
3) Keep living. And loving. And caring. We don’t get this time back. It IS possible to fight evil and live happily at the same time. There are a lot of us fighting for this country and the principles of Individual Rights. No one person has to fight alone every waking moment. I’m certainly not asking anyone to do that. I’m just asking that you sign up for a shift or perform a few tasks.
Someone told a veteran that their service in the military didn’t count, because that veteran wasn’t in a war. Ok. Let me explain something to all who do not understand what it means to put your name on the dotted line, raise your hand to take that oath, then put on that uniform.
It doesn’t matter what is going on in the world, war or peace, when an individual joins the military, because everything can change in an instant. By putting on that uniform, you say “Whatever happens, I’m here to defend life, liberty and our Constitution. I’m willing to change my life in a way that few ever do. I’m prepared to be away from my home and family; to live in terrible conditions; to be hot, cold, hungry, hurting, miserable beyond what many ever experience; to be bored out of my mind with tedious, mundane work. I’m willing to be called away from my home at a moments notice, having no idea when I may return. I’m willing to stand guard while others sleep, to kill enemies that would harm us and to witness horror, so that the majority won’t have to do it. I’m prepared to die to preserve our way of life.”
A man joins the military in 1941. He is sent to Hawaii on December 1st. Do you really think he thought he might die six days later? Or that he would watch his friends die? Or that he would be pulling burned, mangled bodies out of wreckage? No. But, he was there.
The man who joined in January, 1945, was never deployed to a foreign country. His entire 20 year service was in relative peace time, most of it at Ft. Leavenworth in the kitchen. He was there.
The man who joined in 1989 with a great assignment on Azores, ended up deployed in Desert Storm. He wasn’t infantry. He was in supply. He was there.
The woman who had served 18 years, working as a secretary on bases around the world, was looking forward to her last assignment at the Pentagon. She never killed anyone, never fired a shot at an enemy and her worst injury was a papercut…until September 11, 2001. She was there.
When we join, we have no idea what will happen. When we join the military, we pray there will be no war, only peace. But, if that doesn’t happen…We Are There.